Hi Lisa! Ok, so this review has a bit more body and oomph to it :) Just be careful that you don't dedicate too much time to the synopsis; I think you could have abridged the first paragraph somewhat, and spent a bit more time of the next section - the use of colour, the symbolism of the gothic castle etc. Be careful that the quotes you choose actually back up what you are trying to say in your discussion ; your quote that begins 'His visual style has always been inventive...'probably should have been cut at that point, rather than going on to include the bit about Burton's style being a 'collection of bits'. By including the last section of the quote, you are no longer focusing on the style of the film, but you are discussing this authors opinion on Tim Burton's film-making in general. Also, the quote about art being detrimental to our survival, doesn't really seem to have anything to do with the film at all! Be aware of where your quotes are coming from - Wiki is a no-no!! You need your sources to be as academic as possible, so be very wary of delving into other people's film reviews on blogs...chances are, they are just 'Joe Bloggs', and may not have a clue what they are actually talking about ! :)
Be careful that the words you use, mean what you think they do.... your sentence 'Edward grows a very wide population among the town', sounds as though he is out having lots of illegitimate children, and boosting the towns population! You wanted to say 'Edward grows in POPULARITY in the town', I believe....... :)
In your bibliography, make sure you have the author's surname first, followed by their initial, then just the year in brackets, not the full date. Likewise within the text- just the surname and the year.
Hi Lisa!
ReplyDeleteOk, so this review has a bit more body and oomph to it :) Just be careful that you don't dedicate too much time to the synopsis; I think you could have abridged the first paragraph somewhat, and spent a bit more time of the next section - the use of colour, the symbolism of the gothic castle etc.
Be careful that the quotes you choose actually back up what you are trying to say in your discussion ; your quote that begins 'His visual style has always been inventive...'probably should have been cut at that point, rather than going on to include the bit about Burton's style being a 'collection of bits'. By including the last section of the quote, you are no longer focusing on the style of the film, but you are discussing this authors opinion on Tim Burton's film-making in general. Also, the quote about art being detrimental to our survival, doesn't really seem to have anything to do with the film at all!
Be aware of where your quotes are coming from - Wiki is a no-no!! You need your sources to be as academic as possible, so be very wary of delving into other people's film reviews on blogs...chances are, they are just 'Joe Bloggs', and may not have a clue what they are actually talking about ! :)
Be careful that the words you use, mean what you think they do.... your sentence 'Edward grows a very wide population among the town', sounds as though he is out having lots of illegitimate children, and boosting the towns population! You wanted to say 'Edward grows in POPULARITY in the town', I believe....... :)
In your bibliography, make sure you have the author's surname first, followed by their initial, then just the year in brackets, not the full date. Likewise within the text- just the surname and the year.